Date: 20th January 2009 at 2:53pm
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Manchester City, oh dear, the single most hilarious team in the world. On the last day of the transfer window they suddenly got obscenely rich and started to put in bids for everyone whom they’ve heard about in Football Manager 2008. They ended up with Robinho and told us that they would be challenging for a Champions League place.

The reality, though, is that City are now fighting against relegation, their defending is comedy at times and they lost their cup final as well. Never mind though, they wanted to pull off the big thing and put a bid in for Kaka. A bid of Ł100m or something which would be enough to get them a proper team, but no, they went for the big name.

And guess what? The big name told them to do one. Well that was unexpected, that was. Who’d have thought that one of the best players in the world, fighting for the Serie A title with his club where he is loved above all, would not want to fight against relegation in the Premier League? Oh.

But never mind, City are not to be deterred. They went and splashed fourteen million – FOURTEEN MILLION – pounds on CRAIG BELLAMY. This deal is not worth 14 million. This is absolutely priceless: instead of one of the best players in the world they ended up with… Bellamy! They never disappoint us, do they?