Date: 19th November 2008 at 3:47pm
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Gerard Pique came up with such obvious nonsense in Barcelona-based daily Sport about United that I would not be surprised that some embarassed agent or club official would make him to retract his words.

The young Spanish defender who left United in the summer to re-join Barcelona, spoke about his life at United.

‘At United there were some incredible things happening. Everyone was allowed to eat what they wanted and one must remember that the English diet is just like people say.

‘Every two weeks we had to be checked out on a machine that measured the amount of fat we had in our bodies.

‘It would be a surprise that none of the players broke the machine because of the amount of hamburgers and beer they had.

‘The gaffer, as Ferguson is known in Manchester, spoke in English with a Scottish accent but it sounded like Chinese to me.

‘But I was not the worst and there are players still there who do not understand him yet.’


Oh yeah, that Ronaldo chap is really fat, he’s clearly struggling with lack of stamina. Meanwhile, scientific Barcelona perfectly looked after their players, just look at Ronaldinho… oh.

Can’t understand Fergie? Well, it’s not easy but it’s most definitely not Chinese. Maybe you could have asked for help… fancy a bit of Cockney? Then you should have turned to Rio and if it’s a true northwest accent you wanted then Scholes would have been your man.

However, as I have said, all this is nonsense and I would not be surprised the least if hasty denials were soon on their way, with Pique claiming he’s been misinterpreted which is the most popular excuse these days.